Harmonizing Sexuality and Spirituality


When I was in college, I was a man in conflict. I loved Jesus, and I hated and loved my sexual sin.

Late one night, walking alone across my college campus, feeling defeated, having done again what I promised a thousand times I wouldn’t do, I cried out in desperation to God: “I know you love me, God, and I love you! And I know you hate this stuff I’m doing, and I hate that I’m doing it! So why won’t you just take it from me?!!”

I wanted a thunderbolt. I wanted a miracle. I wanted the power of God to flood down upon me, changing me once and for all.

What I got was silence.

Why is that our passion for Christ can feel so disconnected from our romantic and sexual passions? Why can it seem like spirituality and sexuality run on two parallel tracks going in opposite directions and never touch?

Whatever the reason we experience this spiritual-sexual split, we can be sure that, to quote Jesus, “In the beginning it was not so” (Matthew 19:8).

In the beginning, mankind’s experience of sexuality and spirituality were harmonious.

Imagine that for a moment. What must that have been like?

What must it have been like for Adam and Eve to look upon each others’ naked bodies, to desire each other, to touch one another, to share the most intimate embrace with each other, and to do so all in the light of God’s presence, innocence, and joy?

It must have been glorious. It must have been ecstasy.

Harmony between sexuality and spirituality means more than just resisting temptation (although certainly it includes that) and more than just doing the right thing (certainly it includes that, too).

When different forces are in harmony, they complement each other. They make one another more full, more powerful, more beautiful. Listen to singers harmonizing and you get a sense of what I mean. Each by itself sounds beautiful, but in harmony, the goodness multiplies.

How can this happen for us in the areas of sexuality and spirituality?

First and foremost, we must believe it can. Despite how many times you’ve tried and failed, despite how long the journey, despite the scarcity of examples around you, would you dare to believe God can re-harmonize these aspects of your life?

Secondly, we must pursue this harmony through God’s grace. Rules alone are insufficient for the task. On our own, we can’t re-harmonize sexuality and spirituality. But Jesus meant it when He said, “For the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost” (Luke 19:10), and this includes the lost harmony between them. “Through God’s grace” will require our participation, but it is Jesus Himself who will bring the healing and restoration.

This is what Regeneration is about. Wherever you are on this journey, we’d be honored to walk with you.

If you’re a man between 18 and 25(ish), join us this Saturday, May 5 from 6 – 9pm in Towson, MD for FORGE | Restoring Manhood. Through worship, talks, testimonies, conversations, and reflection, we’ll be getting after how God re-harmonizes sexuality and spirituality in men. To learn more or to register, click here. (Scholarships available.)

Leave a comment below: What stirs in you when you consider the idea that sexuality and spirituality are meant to sing in harmony?

Learning the tune,

Thanks For Reading.

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