Marriage Recovery
- 5 Things You Can Do For Your Spouse After Infidelity
- Recognizing a Destructive Marriage
- How Do We Cultivate Healthy, Sexual Intimacy In Our Marriages?
- Scripture that points to Marriage Recovery
- Recommended Books on Marriage Recovery
- Recommended Videos on Marriage Recovery
- All Articles on Marriage Recovery
This ever updated page pulls together our most recent (and archival) library of content that focuses on Marriage Recovery. The Scripture, articles, podcasts, and videos below all focus on this important and tender subject.
If you’ve been unfaithful either through pornography use or in an extra-marital affair, there is work to be done. And if you have been hurt by your spouse’s betrayal, there is work to be done.
Below you will find excerpts that speak directly to the deep need within us to recover from betrayal traumas and infidelity.
At the end of this page, you’ll find a list of books, videos, and other content we have on Marriage Recovery.
This is a great place to begin your marriage recovery journey. We are here to help in any way we can.
5 Things You Can Do For Your Spouse After Infidelity
The road to healing for a sexually addicted man or woman can be long and difficult. When that man or woman is married, they also have to consider the healing their spouse needs. If you’ve been unfaithful either through pornography use or in an extra-marital affair, here are five things you can do to help your spouse heal:
Tell her or him the whole truth.
Too often when infidelity comes to light, the offending spouse is tempted to admit to only that which has been discovered. He thinks, “Why add more pain when she’s already hurting enough?” or she wonders, “If he’s this angry already, then just think how angry he’ll be if he learns about everything else.” Whatever the justification, it amounts to the idea that if there’s any hope of saving the marriage, then those things that are still hidden need to stay hidden.
But this fails to recognize that it is not just the infidelity that has wounded your spouse, the deception has too, perhaps even more deeply. As devastating as it is to learn that a husband or wife has been unfaithful, the deception can be even more crippling because it leaves the betrayed spouse unsure what is real and what is false. How do they know what steps to take if they can’t trust the ground under their feet?
This doesn’t mean sharing every sordid detail, but it does mean sharing the full scope of your infidelity. Find an experienced pastor, therapist, sponsor, or spiritual coach who can help you prepare and fully disclose what you have done.
RECOGNIZING A DESTRUCTIVE MARRIAGE
Can you recognize a destructive relationship?
No relationship is perfect. But, we’re talking about more than just feeling disappointed. Can you tell the difference between a difficult relationship and one that is tearing you down?
In this episode of “Becoming Whole,” Josh and Kit identify patterns to look for and unpack what they mean.
Our deepest desire is to be known and loved. At a deep level then, you must be aware that something is not right. We hope this message puts some light on the truth about your relationships, the good and the bad.
We hope you’ll learn what is healthy versus unhealthy.
We hope you’ll be empowered to make change and move forward in health and reclaim your hope. (This conversation is inspired by “The Emotionally Destructive Marriage: How to Find Your Voice and Reclaim Your Hope” by Leslie Vernick. Please see the Homework and Extras section below for more)
How Do We Cultivate Healthy, Sexual Intimacy In Our Marriages?
We’ve all been there – struggling to navigate sex and intimacy in marriage, often stumbling in the dark, without a guide or compass.
Josh and Kit are here to shed some light on this often taboo topic, sharing our personal experiences and the lessons we’ve learned along the way. We delve into how our views on sex have been formed more by media than by sincere, God-honoring conversations.
We remind you that every marriage is unique, and finding a mutual understanding can be a beautifully complex journey.
Ever wondered how to untangle the web of desires, expectations, and personal histories we bring to our marriages? Join us as we reveal the pivotal role of communication in your relationship.
By expressing our drives and desires, we can learn to love selflessly, balancing our needs with those of our partners. We discuss the concept of frequency in marriage, offering insight on how to find a rhythm that works for both parties without getting caught up in the performance or expectations, but rather, focusing on the spiritual connection that physical intimacy can foster.
Now, let’s talk about cultivating a respectful and loving approach towards sex in marriage.
Scripture ON Marriage Recovery
- Proverbs 6:32
- Hebrews 13:4
- 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
- 1 John 4:18
- Proverbs 10:12
- Colossians 3:12-14
- Ephesians 4:2
- 1 Thessalonians 5:11
- 1 John 3:18
- Ephesians 5:33
- Mark 10:6-9
Recommended Books
- The Great Sex Rescue: The Lies You’ve Been Taught and How to Recover What God Intended by Sheila Wray Gregoire
- Building True Intimacy by Dan Drake
- Help. Them. Heal: Teaching You Both How to Heal Your Relationship After Sexual Betrayal by Carol Juergensen Sheets
- Love Talk: Speak Each Other’s Language Like You Never Have Before by Les Parrott , Leslie Parrott
- The Gift of Sex: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment– by Clifford Penner
- Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and Heal by Barbara Steffens
- Intimate Deception: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Betrayal by Dr. Sheri Keffer
- Full Disclosure: Seeking Truth After Sexual Betrayal by Janice Caudill & Dan Drake
- The Meaning of Marriage by Tim & Kathy Keller
- Cherish by Gary Thomas
Recommended Videos
- Creating a Shared Story | Dr. Jake Porter
- Help Them Heal with Carol The Coach
- Imago Dialogue/Safe Conversations with Harville & Helen
Additional Content
- Navigating the Journey of Recovery Together
- Understanding Betrayal Trauma and Navigating Disclosure in Marriage
- Navigating the Challenge of Sharing Unwanted Sexual Behavior with Your Spouse
- Rebuilding Trust After Infidelity: A Journey Towards Integrity and Wholeness
- Engage Your Story
- Deepening Your Connection: Exploring the 6 Sides of Intimacy in Marriage
- Embracing Imperfections & Deepening Connections in Marriage
- The Aftershock of Betrayal and What Comes Next
- Is It Okay to Fantasize About Your Spouse?
- The Courage to Confess
- When Your Wife Asks Do You Think I’m Pretty?
- He’s Cheating. Now What?
- 4 Reasons You Don’t Want to Talk about Sex (but Should)
- Your Story and Your Sexual Integrity
- Sexual Integrity Is Sexed Integrity
- When Do I Tell My Significant Other?
- 4 Reasons to Open Up About Your Sexual Past
- What’s Your Vision of Sexuality?
- Why Lust in Marriage Isn’t Healthy
- Is Lust Okay in Marriage?
- Why You’re Still Angry at Your Recovering Spouse
- The Earthquake of Sexual Betrayal
- Looking At Sex in a New Way
- Do You Need a Different Sexual Lens?
- When Spouses Have Different Sex Drives Part 2